Once again I find I need to welcome my new subscribers. This is not a bad problem to have. Each week there are a few more converts to the cult of McSciFi. Okay, not so much a cult as an international coffee klatsch. With no pastries and nary a doily in sight. Still, we have fun so I guess it’s all good.
I know many of you have been paying rapt attention to the slow path we’ve been walking to see if we could get The Brittle Riders made into a film. For you newbies, just CLICK HERE and scroll through the last few posts to get brought up to date.
I’ll make a VERY long story short. Last night I got asked to turn over a fully developed script for a pilot. I know many of you are high fiving each other, busting out the good booze, and saying how great this is. Yes and no. It’s more of a good news / bad news thing. The good news is that some companies are interested in seeing what this could look like on screen. The bad news is that developing such a script will require me to shut down for six months, focus on this exclusively, and not make a penny. Or, I could hire someone to take six months out of their life to develop it and pay them.
Neither option works well for me. I can’t afford to pay rent with nothing but my stunning good looks and award winning personality, and hiring a Hollywood pro to do this would cost about the same as a new car.
Certainly, with the connections I’ve built over the years I could get a break on the price. But a break is not free. I’m sixty years old and not some kid playing with a trust fund. I plan on getting married this July, which costs a couple of bucks on its own, so having an extra five figures lying around that I can burn through isn’t realistic.
On the plus side, the people who have been working with me behind the scenes live in the same reality I do so no one is burning bridges or calling it a day. We have a few options, some more viable than others.
The problem with corporate Hollywood, as I have discovered on this journey, is it expects you to be at its beck and call, with every possible permutation of your presentation, at a moment’s notice. I have been called in a grocery store, on a Sunday morning while prepping for church, and have been asked to describe, in detail, the pilot for The Brittle Riders. Because, as you know, even though I have never directed a film, I can whip a ninety-minute film précis out of my butt at will.
Clearly, I have a magic butt.
Also, to be polite, I have no intention of joining the immortal zombie ranks of people who flitter from function to function attempting to get someone, anyone, to read their screenplay.
However, it must be noted, I’m asking production companies to put a lot of money into this so I need to have some skin in the game. That’s not the issue. The issue is defining some sort of worth for my skin. We all already know how much money is worth.
Don’t get me wrong. If I get something a little more concrete than “interest” I’ll dive into the deep end with weights on my ankles. But I need crystal clear justification to make that kind of commitment.
All things considered, this is more of a bump in the road than a death knell, but it does put a damper on my plans to celebrate James Brown’s birthday. There are some very good, and well connected, people who want this to happen. That doesn’t mean it will, but it does mean it has a puncher’s chance. Which is all anyone can ask.
Let’s be honest, a cinematic universe which has Geldish, R’yune, and Sland knocking back flagons of skank while N’leah and Braarb steal bar rags to wipe the evening dew off their naked breasts, all while the five of them snag (allegedly) raw meat off a platter as they plot a violent insurrection is exactly the kind of cinematic universe the world needs.
That’s just the opening scene.
So it is written, so should it be done.
If anything useful happens you’ll be the second to know. With me being the first, obviously.
Until next week stay safe and sane.