I get the odd email, from time to time, wanting to know why I don’t provide free shipping or deep discounts on the autographed books I sell online. There are a couple of reasons. First, the people who do those types of promotions tend to have deep pockets, or rich parents, and can afford to take a loss to look cool. None of those advantages apply to me. Second, and this seems worth noting, aside from wish-based anecdotal evidence, I have seen zero benefits from the effort. No serious increase in sales, no plethora of raving reviews, nothing. The “everyone else does it” excuse stopped impressing me when I was nine, and shows no sign of regaining traction in my life.
Don’t get me wrong. Give-Aways, as part of a larger promotion, can be awesome. They can be the final enticement an “on the fence” customer needs.
“You mean I can buy an autographed book AND become a red-headed werewolf? Where’s my credit card?”
While I can’t help with your lycanthropic fantasies, I can help you celebrate an odd anniversary and get some cool gear.
Two years ago this week Spreadshirt was forced to shut down all of its printing and manufacturing plants due to the pandemic. We were all promised it would be just for a week or two. But it wouldn’t be until May that everything was up and running again. And, even then, strict precautions were put in place and many are still enforced. Despite that, orders were delayed until they could get fully staffed again.
That said, everything’s humming along nicely now, which brings us to this.
If you go to my Gear Page and order something to impress your friends and humiliate your enemies, you can add to your joy by discovering they’ll toss in free shipping for today, and today only. The offer is in a little black bar at the top of my page. Just click it and have fun ordering.
To make the effort worth your time there are a wide variety of new colors you can pick from for clothing and you can preview each before you make our choice. Additionally we’re up to over one hundred items you can choose from to enhance your social standing, and we’ve added cool stickers you can attach to your laptop or significant other. Really, S/Os love when you slap stickers on their foreheads. It’s just like foreplay.
PLUS, if you send me proof you bought some gear, even if it’s just one of the stickers, I will refund the cost of shipping on any autographed book(s) you buy. Given the current state of U.S.P.S., that’s no small offer.
And, to prove I’m a mensch, this offer applies no matter whether you purchase from Hybrid Zero, Legends Parallel, or Bill McSciFi.
If you purchase from all of them I’ll light a candle in your honor.
That’s enough excitement for now. Until next week stay safe, sane, and hug a loved one or two.
